being picked on in school

black kids beating me up in the back of the bus in Chicago. just a few scuffles, pushing and the like. never anything too bad. then in ohio name calling. Squanto. all sorts of stares. questions about my religion, where i was from, what i believed, where my parents were from, all that. asking a girl out and having the entire school giving me a hard time about it.

then in highschool having people make fun of me behind my back. my differences had grown beyond my skin color, and my putka, i was also now emotionally crippled and scared to be myself in front of anyone. this was the result of the abuse brought about by having an uncommon skin color for the region and an uncommon head covering for the region. people wuold respond with stares, perhaps it would scale up from there to comments, or even beyond that to fights and name calling. some comments were questions. some asked about all parts of me. others were just jokes at my expense. cruel jokes that highlighted my differences visible or otherwise and brought others amusement to others while remind themselves of these.

in college i wasnt really accepted amongst the more popular children, clearly being ostracized perhaps because i seemed like i didn't really even want to be around those other children. having long since been sucked in by kirby and his friends i kept to their cluster and never strayed much.

after i moved home and then back and began a relationship with anita. 140 days strong. you could say i began anew.